The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple
by The Three Wackos and Company
Summary: When three friends are transported from our world to the Jedi Temple chaos ensues, as the friends bumble their way through the process of becoming Jedi Knights. Chapters 5,6 and 7 now up!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I don't own Star Wars, George Lucas does. I am not smart enough to come up with a whole original story by myself…the people who will vouch this for me are my friends and my English teachers. And I also don't own either of my two friends Jezabel Jez or Matt Matt I do own myself Kana and please don't sue me, all you will get is a headache and a parakeet with a very bad temper…so, basically all I am asking you to do is not sue me.

Oh and a little warning, for some reason coffbeingblondcoff I keep switching between …uh…what is the word I'm looking for…points of view, I don't know which ones though cause I never really studied for that class…so get over it!!

The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple

Chapter 1

It was a warm day in June, which really wasn't all that great because the semester finals started the next day. Matt and IKana were chatting about the latest star wars jedi apprentice book. Which wasn't really that new. Me and Jez were about to go up to the library and beg mercy for the books that had somehow "disappeared" while in our possession. It was an accident…REALLY!! When we were discouraged by Matt who was not about to give up on a conversation that he had a great interest in.

"Come on!! You guys are just leaving because you don't know as much about the Jedi apprentice books as I do!" He adamantly yelled after us, and it also caused him to get some odd looks from the upperclassmen. Me and Jez weren't about to live that challenge down so…

"Yeah right you chicken wuss!" We screeched after him. Then Jez turned to me.

"I don't know anything about what you guys are talking about" she whispered to me.

"That's fine, I can hold up for you I've read all the books in this series that are out." I whispered back confidently. Matt, who happened to have a copy of one of the books with him, held it up and said.

"Why don't we have a little trivia game to see who really knows the most" He grinned evilly then began to recite a question that he had obviously prepared before hand. "Kana, What kind of ship did Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon fly in when they went to the planet Rutan?"

"I…I…don't know!!" I cried out. The English teacher who also happened to be in charge of the school plays looked at me then ran into the school office, probably to alter my class choices for next year so I would be in drama instead of my choice of science.

"Ha ha!! I win you lose!!" Matt began to dance around…think Jim Carrey from the Ace Ventura movies.

"NO!! I demand a rematch!!"

"Well you can't have one!! Ha ha and for good measure…I'll sic Mr. Witikko on you!! WAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA" he began to roll on the cafeteria floor laughing hysterically.

When suddenly the book that was being squashed underneath him began to glow, and then it floated into the air please note there is nobody in the cafeteria…err…commons area so we were the only ones seeing this that wasn't the worst part the worst part was when it began to talk and this is what it said…

"All who stand before me who believe themselves to be masters of the read word shall come and learn that they truly know nothing…important anyway…and those who truly know nothing…important…shall also come and learn all they need to know…that's somewhat important." The book started to glow brighter and brighter then there was a really bright flash of light that came from the book and all three of us were knocked unconscious. Matt was the first to revive and being the chicken wuss he was passed out again when he saw a green blob with huge ears leaning over him.

"AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!! GREEN MARTIAN MEN!! thunk" Jez was awoken by Matt falling back over, and I was woke up because Matt's head happened to land on my already hurt foot.

"OOOWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!! GET OFF MY FOOT YOU words started to come out of my mouth that would make a sailor blush" This barrage of words coming out of my mouth woke up Matt.

"Huh? Where are we?" Matt asked as he looked around the room. A tall black dude answered him.

"You are on Courasant in the JedI temple. I am Mace Windu Kana snickered and that "Green Martian man" as you called him is Yoda. These other people sitting around the room are other Jedi masters but they aren't important enough for the authoress to remember their names. And the two standing behind you are Jedi Knight Qui-Gon Jin Kana, Jez, and Matt snickered and his padiwan learner Obi-Wan Kenobi Matt started to snicker but Kana kicked him in the shin They are the ones who brought you here. he waited for a remark form one or all of us but all he got were dumbfounded stares"

"What do you mean brought? Where were we found?" Jez being the sanest one in the group at the moment asked. The one called Qui-Gon answered.

"We found you on a planet that we landed on for an emergency stop." Kana got this confused expression on her face, but lets face it that isn't unusual, so moving on.  
"What planet were we found on? And what were we doing there?" Kana asked because she was well, confused.

"You were found on Hapes. As for what you were doing there, we aren't sure. The three of you were all unconscious. But you. Qui-Gon pointed to Matt appeared to be in some sort of victory pose with your hand over your head." Qui-Gon replied to Kana's question.

"Even unconscious you were being a smart alec." Jez said then promptly punched Matt in the arm at the same time Kana aimed to hit him in the leg.

"Hey, what was that for?! Just because I'm smarter than yoOW!" Jez hit Matt again.

"Bruised you shall be if keep talking you do." the little green man told him.

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Jez, Matt and Kana tripped over each other trying to get away from the now talking little green man.

"Hey wait a second!" Matt yelled. "Are you Yoda?"

"Yoda I am. Friends we shall be hmm….?"

"Uh," the three looked at each other having no clue what Yoda had said.

"Sure why not?" Jez finally replied.

"Speak for yourself" said Matt. "I don't trust anyone that can stab you with his ears."

"Matt, its Yoda." retorted both Jez and Kana.

"How do we know it's the real Yoda?" asked Matt.

Kana and Jez looked at each other and then said in a dramatic voice. "We don't."

"Know someone I do." started Yoda.

"I would hope you know someone." interrupted Matt.

"No you dork, let him finish." Jez glared.

"Know someone I do that is looking for the talent you ladies have." Finished Yoda.

"Hey!" screeched Matt. "I am not a girl!"

"He meant us you idiot!" Kana lifted her had as if to punch him then changed her mind and lowered her fist. "Who is he?"

"Named Heir Veh he is." Yoda informed her.

"That means Mr. Pain in german." Matt stated.

"What does it mean here?" Jez gulped.

"Means Hier Veh it does and go to work for him you shall, or at least until next Tuesday." replied Yoda.

"And what happens then?" all three asked with glitter in their eyes.

"Tested by us you shall be." Yoda told them.

"To be apprentices?" all asked.

"Yes." answered Yoda.

"Well, why not now?" asked a dumbfounded Kana.

"Because a weekend it be." responded Yoda.

"Why not Monday?" jez asked.

"Bad Mondays be" Yoda shuddered.

Matt feeling he had to ask a question asked, "Why is poop brown?"

The group of three was quickly escorted to Hier Veh's place. Where they were greeted by someone who looked like their English teacher from ninth grade.

"Hallo, hallo I've been expecting you, Yogurt told me you were on your way." yelled the hyperactive man.

"You mean Yoda." corrected Kana.

"No Yogurt."

"Yoda"

"Yogie"

"Yoda"

Matt and Jez watched the argument and eventually got dizzy and fainted.

"Fine Yoda." agreed Hier Veh.

"Can you let us in already?" asked the newly revived Matt and Jez.

"So what are your names?" asked Hier Veh.

"Well that's Jez and he's Matt and I" said Kana pointing at herself, in the process she pokes Matt in the eye. "Am Kana."

"Ohh goodie, I needed a new mat." said an excited Hier Veh.

"Not mat, Matt." corrected an argry Matt.

"That's what I said"

"No, M-A-T-T not M-A-T."

Seeing that Hier Veh obiously was confused. Matt decided just to drop the whole subject.  
Kana and Jez who were by now very confused pushed thier way into Hier Veh's apartment. Once inside they gazed around in shock.

"This place is huge!"

Well that's all for now. Hopefully you've enjoyed the beginning of what is to be a fun story. I'll be posting the next chapter sometime later this week. Don't forget to leave us a review and tell us what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars. Nor do I own Matt or Jessie.

Note: Due to someone complaining coughMattcough I will no label who wrote which part of the round robin.

The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple

Chapter 2

"How could you afford all of this?" Matt asked.

"Know the answer to that which you asked I do." Yoda came in through the door behind Matt.

written by kana

"Matt" Kana stepped between him and Yoda. "This stuff was probably donated from the temple." She looked to Heir Veh.

"Hehe…it was donated…sure." Heir Veh quickly changed subjects. "Come Mr. Matt I shall give you a tour." The three of them, three being Heir Veh, Matt, and Yoda. Turned and began to look at the furniture.

"Now's our chance." Jez whispered. "Run!" the two girls ran out the door and onto the landing pad.

"What about Matt?" Kana asked.

"He's a big lad, he can take care of himself."

"Okay then…umm…where do we go now?" Kana looked at Jez and waited for an answer. She got one after a couple seconds.

"Why don't we find a transport." Jez came up with the sensible answer.

"Okay, there's one! Kana pointed to a nearby ship." We got on and fastened our seatbelts. Always wear a seatbelt! "Go! Go!" Kana yelled at the driver. He went.

"So where does this thing go?" Jez asked as soon as we were safely on our way.

"The Jedi Temple." Was the driver's reply.

"D'OH!"

The ship docked at a landing pad.

"So…what part of the temple are we at now?" Kana asked as she and Jez got off of the transport.

"The sign says that we go that way we will find an indoor lake." Jez pointed at a door.

"WooHoo! Lets go!" Kana stuck a fist in the air.

The girls followed the signs until they came to a really big room with a really big pond in the middle.

"WOW!" Jez exclaimed running to the water and jumping in with all her clothes still on.

Kana who was looking around at this time spotted an incredibly cute guy walking by the shore. She jogged over next to him.

"Hey, Wazup?!" Kana jogged up behind him. "Hey I know you!" she exclaimed.

"You're one of the peeps that found us! Uh…uh…Obi Gon Kenobi!"

"It's Obi Wan." He turned around and stuck his hand out for a handshake.

"Oldie Wan, got it." Kana shook his hand.

"Obi Wan"

"Obi's Gone?"

"Obi Wan"

"Obi…Wan?"

"Yes" he sighed. "Finally…but wait a minute, didn't you come here with another person?" he asked.

"Umm…no, why do you ask?"

"Because I thought I just heard someone splashing around."

Kana looked at the lake. "I don't see anyone." And it was true, there was no one in the lake.

Well folks that's all for now. Look for another update sometime next week! Don't forget to leave us a review!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Neither me nor Matt own any part of the star wars galaxy. Nor do we own anything else we may mention in this thing.

The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple

Chapter 3

(written by Matt)

"And this is my old mat, the one that you will be replacing." stated Heir Veh pointing to a rolled up mat.

"But I'm not that kind of mat!" replied an angry Matt.

"Ohhhhhh"

"You get it then?" Matt's eye was starting to twitch.

"You don't lay be the door?"

"NO!"

"Good, i need a new mat in my Nova"

"Jez! Kana will you explain this to him?" ordered Matt to, well, no one.

"Hey where did they go?" asked a dumbfounded Matt.

"I don't know, but I want to test you in the Nova." stated an excited Heir Veh.

"No Heir Veh. Bring up a good point Matt does." Yoda said.

"What point is that?" asked Heir Veh.

"Gone the other two are." replied Yoda.

Heir Veh looked around just noticing that the two were gone. "Where did Jez and Gona go?"

"They were right behind me." Matt glanced around the apartment.

"How could they be on your right and behind you at the same time?" Heir Veh looked at Matt warily.

"Time there is not for him to answer, with me he shall come." Yoda motioned for Matt to follow him.

"Okay, just bring him back so I can fit him for the Nova!" Heir Veh yelled after (what could become master and padawan) Yoda and Matt.

written be Kana

Kana and Obi-wan were walking away from the lake.

"What's that?" Kana asked pointing at Obi's waist.

"That would be my belt." He rolled his eyes.

"No, that." Kana pointed again.

"My comlink?"

"No"

"My food packs?"

"No." Kana looked at him strangely. "Why are you carrying food?"

"Because it came with the belt." Obi sighed impatiently. "What are you looking at?!"

"That!" Kana pointed again.

"My lightsaber?"

"No!"

Obi-wan was starting to get frustrated. "But there isn't anything else on my belt!"

"Yes there is!" Kana insisted.

Obi looked at his belt. "All that's left are my breath mints."

"Exactly!" Kana grabbed the mints from his belt and popped one into her mouth. "Mm...minty freshness"

Obi looked at her like she was crazy. "...okay..."

Kana handed Obi back his breath mints. Then as he placed the mints back on his belt Kana grabbed his lightsaber.

"So this is a lightsaber." Kana twirled the handle like a baton.

"Careful!" Obi-wan tried to grab the lightsaber but Kana spun it out of his reach.

"Catch me if you can!" Kana sprinted out of the lake room.

"Gimmie back my lightsaber!" Obi-wan whined chasing after Kana.

Kana ran through the corridors turning in random directions. Then turning a corridor Kana slammed into someone.

"Ow!" Kana fell onto the floor. Obi flew around the corner and tripped over Kana.

"And what are you two up to?" An amused voice sounded over their ears.

"Master!" Obi Wan scrambled to his feet but tripped over Kana again and fell back down.

Kana took the liberty of answering. "We were just playing around."

"That's nice, it's about time you started spending more time with people your own age."

"But master..." Obi tried to interupt but was ignored.

"And since you two seem to be getting along so well, I'll volunteer to be your master." Qui Gon smiled at his idea.

"You'll be my master?" Kana asked grinning up at him.

Yes Qui Gon answered. "I'll go and sort it out with the council right now." He turned to leave.

Kana turned to Obi wan. "Looks like we're going to be partners."

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Obi wan ran off screaming.

"What's his problem?" Kana watched him run off. "Oh well, at least I still have his lightsaber."

The end for now!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! please R & R!

Kana, Matt, Jez


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer- We (we begin The Three Whackos) don't own anything in this fic but our selves. And according to our gym teacher he owns that too.

The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple

Chapter 4

"Kana!" exclaimed Matt. As he walk around the corner.

"One we have found." Stated Yoda.

Kana turned to Yoda and Yelled,

"Would you stop talking like that!!"

"No!" stated a ticked off Yoda.

"Yes!" screamed Kana.

"NO!"

"YES!"

Matt tried to follow but got dizzy and fell down. Once on the floor he decided to count ceiling tiles.

"One." counted Matt

"NO!" yelled a still ticked off Yoda.

"What do you mean that was one tile." Said Matt

"YES!" yelled Kana

"Thank you for agreeing with Me." said an excited Matt.

"What do you mean," yelled Kana, and pointed at herself, "I never agree with you."

"That's not true." Matt said.

"What do you mean, it is true." Yelled Kana.

"But if I had said that was true, then we would have agreed, so in order to keep it true I had to say it wasn't true." Stated Matt

Kana and Yoda starred at Matt.

"Confusing that was." Said Yoda.

"That was confusing." Said Kana.

"No it wasn't." stated Matt.

Yoda gave him a questioning look, then turned to Kana and said

"Have mission you do."

"Ohhh…Goodie." Yelled Kana.

"What about me Yoda?" asked Matt.

"Special mission for you I have." Winked Yoda.

"Okay as long as I don't have to clean stuff, or go to Heir Veh's."

"Why not?" Kana's voice grew sympathetic. "I thought you liked cleaning stuff."

"I hate cleaning! You…you…clean freak!" Matt shouted into the Hallway.

"How dare you call me that!" Kana glowered brandishing Obi-Wan's lightsaber.

"Where did you get that?!" Matt questioned. "I want one."

"Give one to you we will not. Hurt yourself you would." Said Yoda

"Why not?"

"Kana waiting for you at the pond Qui-Gon is." Stated Yoda.

"Are you ignoring me?" asked Matt.

"Okay, I'm on my way." Stated Kana and she ran off.

"Lying I was, here" and he handed Matt a lightsaber, "advanced it is."

"How is it advanced?" asked Matt.

"Has three modes it does, normal, double bladed, and whip mode." Stated Yoda.

"So it's like Darth Mauls only with a whip mode?" asked Matt

"Who be this Darth Maul?" asked Yoda

"What he's the one that killed………never mind." Exclaimed Matt.

"Who be this Never Mind guy?" asked Yoda.

"Just forget about that." Said Matt.

"Okay, two blades it does have, the round button turns on the single blade, the square turns on the second blade, and the shiny triangle turns it to whip mode." Explained Yoda, well normal and not in Yodish.

Matt gave him a puzzled look.

"Want to confuse you I did not." Stated Yoda.

"Ohh…Okay, what is my mission?"

"Follow Kana you will, watch her you will, seen you can't be, evaluate her." Stated Yoda.

"So I'm a spy?" asked Matt

"Sound right that does." Stated Yoda.

"What sounds right?" Kana ran back toward the duo.

"Er…nothing." Matt stammered. "Uh, where are you going?"

"Obi's room." Kana replied.

"Qui-Gon is making me share a room with him."

"Lovely."

Matt looked puzzled. "What's with the overcoat? It's like eighty in here."

"Oh the coat, do you like it?" Kana spun around.

"It's…big." Matt said glancing at the coat, and it was. When Kana stopped twirling the coat came down past her knees.

"I found it…" Kana glanced at Yoda. "Somewhere."

"Look familiar that coat does." Yoda waddled over then turned back to Matt. "Matt, come here you will. A task for you I have."

"What is it?" Matt asked eagerly.

"Lift me up you shall, read the tag I must." Matt lifted Yoda up and Yoda grabbed the tag twisting it around so he could read it nearly choking Kana in the process.

"Hmm…right I was belong to Xantos this coat does."

"Aw man, does this mean I have to give it back?"

"No, dead he is. Belong to you this coat does."

"Yay!" Kana skipped happily down the hall and into a room. A few minutes later loud crashes and thuds were heard echoing through the halls.

"Wondering what she is doing I am." Yoda glanced at the door.

"You don't wanna know." Matt started to walk away when Kana poked her head out of the room.

"Hey Matt, c'mer."

"Do I have to?" Matt whined but came. When he was in arms length Kana pulled him into the room and shut the door. Matt screamed from inside the room.

"Wondering what she is doing to him I am." Said Yoda to himself. He walked towards the door, he tried to open the door. He had to jump to reach the knob, and as he jumped the door swung out. It hit him in mid-jump. Yoda went flying just as he was about to land another door opened and hit him. This happen a few more times until he went flying through a newly opened door. Screaming was heard coming from behind the now closed door. Matt and Kana ran to the door.

"What does that sign say?" asked Kana

"Ohhh no it's the girls locker room!" yelled Matt

Kana started to laugh.

"We have to save him." Yelled Matt and he whipped out his lightsaber.

"Where did you get that?" asked Kana

"I stole it from Yoda." Said Matt.

Kana took her lightsaber (which use to be Obi-Wans) out. She had apparently accepted that answer.

"Lets go!" yelled Kana

And they charged in, Matt turned his lightsaber to whip mode.

"Let Yoda go!" Matt shouted as he charged into the room.

"Get out of here you idiot!" Kana shoved him back into the hallway. "This is the girls locker room!"

Matt stood patiently in the hallway while crashes and thuds radiated from the locker room.

"Done!" Kana announced coming triumphantly out of the room. She had an unconscious Yoda on her head.

"Umm…" Matt looked at Kana's head. "Did you know Yoda's on your head?"

Kana's eyes widened in surprise.

"Eww!!" she screamed slapping Yoda off of her head and punting him down the hallway.

"Omph!" Obi omphed as Yoda crashed into his stomach. He had been walking down the hall searching for Kana so he could get his lightsaber back. Straightening he ran over and grabbed Kana by the shoulders.

"That was Master Yoda! You hit Master Yoda!"

"So." Shrugged Kana

"So…So…what do you mean so?" stated a shocked Obi-Wan.

"He's just Yoda." Said Kana.

"Just Yoda!" Yelled Obi-Wan.

There was a large flash of light and Kana pulled a piece of paper out of her cloak and ran down the hall yelling,

"He's so cute when he's mad."

Obi-Wan turned to Matt

"What was that all about?" asked Obi-Wan

"I don't think you want to know." Replied Matt.

With that he turn and walked away. Obi-Wan ran after him.

"Please tell me." Pleaded Obi-Wan

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Fine then I'll beat it out of you."

With that both grabbed for their lightsabers. Obi missed, Matt didn't. Obi missed because he still hadn't gotten a replacement for the one Kana had stole. Matt turned his lightsaber to whip mode and whipped Obi, some how it caught Obi's boxers. Matt pulled back and turned it off.

"Owwww…" yelped Obi as he was given a wedgie. With that Obi ran to his room. Closely followed by Matt. Obi walked through the door and there was a large flash. Matt walked in to find Obi in complete shock.

"I told you, that you didn't want to know." Stated Matt.

Here's why Obi was shocked. His room (which he now shares with Kana) had really changed since he had last visited. The curtains had Obi-pictures on them and so did the carpet, walls, and doors. The beds and doorknobs were shaped to look like Obi-Wan and chained to one of the beds was a life sized Obi-Wan (if you guessed that it was Kana's bed, you're right, give yourself a gold star).

"Now I have a shocked Obi-Wan" stated Kana

What does Kana mean by this well tune in next time to find out.

Matt, Kana, Jez (who still hasn't written a thing)


	5. Chapter 5

The Three Wackos go to The Jedi Temple Ch

The Three Wackos go to The Jedi Temple

Chapter 5

Disclaimer: We The Wackos own nothing in this story but ourselves.

(Written by Matt)

Obi-Wan came out of it and asked, "What do you mean?"

Kana grinned and said, "Here" and handed him some cards, "They're trading cards."

And that was what they were. Only they were Obi-Wan trading cards. Obi-Wan hadn't even looked at them when a large thud was heard, startling them all. Obi dropped the cards, Kana dropped her jaw, and Matt (who had gone into the bathroom) burst through the door yelling, "A head popped out of the toilet, as I was washing my hands. I shut the lid on it and ran."

Kana and Obi ran to look. They came back after a minute and Kana said,

"There's nothing there."

"I must have knocked it back into the pipes." Stated Matt.

"Knocked what back?" asked Qui-Gon, who had just walked in.

"A head was in the toilet!" yelled Matt.

"A toilet was in his head!" yelled Kana at the same time.

"He washed his hands in the toilet!" Obi said at the same time as the others.

"All of them?" asked Qui-Gon.

"No, just the head in the toilet." Responded Matt.

"Who's head was it?" asked Qui-Gon.

Matt gave him a blank look.

"Was it a female?"

"Yes, it had a pony tail. Of course a lot of males around here have them."

He looked around the room at Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon.

"You know who it looked like?" asked Matt.

"Rod Stewart?" asked Kana.

"No, Jez."

"Who's Rod Stewart?" asked Obi-Wan.

"A singer." Stated Kana.

"Where was Jez the last time you saw her?" asked Qui-Gon.

"The lake." Said Kana.

"Let me make a few calls."

"Is Rod Stewart your world's leader?" asked Obi-Wan.

"No, we don't have a world leader." Said Kana.

"You don't?!"

"Nope."

"Okay I called the Jedi Sewage Export Department. J.S.E.D. for short. They said there was a drain from the lake."

"What for?" asked Matt.

"To many toilets were flushed at once. So they needed extra water, and they got it from the lake."

"Are you saying Jez got flushed down the lake?" asked Matt

"Yes, that is what I'm saying."

"Well let's go save Jez!" yelled Matt

"To the sewer!" yelled Kana.

With that she ran out the door, only to come back a second later.

"Does anyone know where the entrance to the sewer is?"

"Follow me." Stated Qui-Gon.

He walked out the door and across the hall to a door. On the door in big bold letters it said:

**SEWER ENTRANCE**

"Wow, that's odd I never saw that before." Said Kana.

"It was hidden behind the wall." Qui-Gon said pointing to a panel lying against the wall further down the hall. Qui-Gon took Kana aside and handed her two long cylinders.

"This is your new lightsaber, it is actually two separate ones but they connect to each other." Said Qui-Gon.

"It's like a jump-rope then?" asked Kana.

"It is if you say it is. Be careful not to cut your legs off."

"I won't"

"Make sure you give Obi-Wan his lightsaber back."

"I will."

She turned towards Obi-Wan and yelled,

"Think fast!" She chucked his lightsaber at the back of his head.

"Omph." Obi-Wan sounded as he toppled head first into the sewer.

"Don't forget your lightsaber!" Kana yelled down. She picked it up off the floor and tossed it through the door. An audible thud was heard.

"Ouch!" yelled Obi-Wan.

"Your turn Kana." Said Matt as he pushed her through the door.

"Ahhh…" screamed Kana; the scream was cut short when she hit bottom.

"You coming with?" Qui-Gon asked Matt.

"I have nothing better to do." Replied Matt, as he flipped through the hole.

Kana starred as matt landed softly on his feet.

"How did you do that?" asked Kana.

"I used the force." Said Matt.

"When and where did you learn to use the force?"

"Yoda taught me when we were looking for Jez and you."

"Ohhh…"

"You know you guys could have used the ladder." Said Qui-Gon as he stepped off the ladder.

"Matt gave me little choice."

"Well let's begin our search." Qui-Gon said as he walked off along the wall.

"Make sure you stay close to the wall." He yelled back.

They had been walking for hours. When Kana (who had been skipping behind the group) turned to look behind her and saw a being made out of turds.

"Hi, guys it took you long enough." Said the Turd being.

"Ahhh…Turd Monster!!" yelled Kana.

The rest of the group whipped around to find Kana jump roping frantically with her lightsaber, as the Turd Monster advanced on her.

"That's the thing I saw in the toilet." Said Matt.

Kana stopped jump roping, to look at the Turd Monster.

"Jez?!"

"Yes, I haven't had a shower for a while." Responded Jez (a.k.a Turd Monster).

"Well we found her." Stated Qui-Gon.

"Now what?"

"We're going to go to sleep." Said Obi-Wan.

"Okay, where is my room?" asked Matt.

"Jez and you will share a room." Said Qui-Gon.

"Okay." Matt grinned at Jez. Jez gave him a worried look back.

Qui-Gon led them to their rooms and said goodnight.

Well that's all forks!! Don't forget to review and tell us if it's worth writing more. Enough positive reviews equals another chapter.

Kana, Matt, Jez


	6. Chapter 6

The Three Wackos Go To The Jedi Temple Ch

The Three Wackos Go To The Jedi Temple

Chapter 6

Disclaimer: We the Wackos own nothing to do with the Star Wars Galaxy, If we did we would be rich, but were not rich so we don't own anything to do with the Star Wars Galaxy.

The next morning the group met in the lunchroom.

"What do I use to eat?" yelled out Kana.

"Use the fork." Said Matt, who had walked up behind her with his tray of food.

"What's that?" asked Jez (who was sitting next to Kana), she pointed at a tiny hand coming out from under Kana's cloak.

"Nothing." Said Kana as she pushed the hand back under the cloak.

"That was an Obi-Wan doll wasn't it?" asked a shocked Matt.

"They're not dolls they're action figures." Said Kana "Unless you would prefer a doll." She pulled out an Obi-Wan doll.

"Kana I say this as a friend," started Matt. "Get a life."

"Tested today you will be." Said Yoda, as he waddled up to the group. Kana quickly stuffed the doll under her cloak.

"I thought you were testing us Tuesday." Said Jez.

"Taco Tuesday it be." Stated Yoda.

"The group gave him a blank look.

"Be HeirVeh's holiday, Taco Tuesday is."

"Ohhhh….." said the group.

"After breakfast, come to Jedi council room you will."

"We will?" asked Jez.

"You will."

"You sure?"

"You will."

"Are you positive?"

"YOU WILL!!" yelled Yoda.

"Okay, just making sure." Said Jez.

"Ticked off you have made him." Said Kana.

"Mock me you should not."

"Why not?"

"Bad for your health it be."

"Done I am."

Yoda scowled and then waddled off.

"Wahoo!! We're being tested!" yelled Kana and Jez.

"I'm not." Said Matt.

"WHAT?!" yelled Jez and Kana.

"Yoda already tested me."

"When?" asked Jez

"When he taught me to use the force."

"He tested you, and taught you to use the force in one lesson."

"It was a long walk."

"Well are you going to watch us be tested?"

"Watch you?! I'm giving the test." Laughed Matt.

"We're doomed." Yelled Jez.

"It's not that bad Jez, it could be worse." Said Kana.

"On top of it I get to pick the test."

"It's worse."

"Well I have to go prepare." Matt got up, grinned and walked away.

An hour later Kana and Jez walked nervously into the council room. They saw Matt standing next to Yoda, smirking to himself.

"Issue test Matt will." Said Yoda.

"So what do we have to do?" asked Kana.

"You must bring me…. a shrubbery!!" screamed Matt. (Ten points if you tell us what movie that was from. Ten more points if you tell us who said it.)

"Your kidding, right?" asked Jez.

"Kid you he does not, tell you all he did not." Said Yoda.

"The shrub has paint on it that only force sensitive people can see. The shrub is somewhere in the Jedi Temple."

"Lets get started Jez." Said Kana.

"The paint is very bright green."

"Okay."

Both raced out of the room.

"I know where it is, I saw it when I was in the sewer." Said Jez.

Jez and Kana raced for the sewer. Kana followed Jez down the ladder, and down to the edge of the sewage.

"There!" Jez pulled a shrub from the ground.

"Where's mine?" asked Kana.

"Down there!" she pointed to a small island in the middle of the sewage stream.

"Go and get it." Said Jez.

"Why me?"

"Because I have mine."

"Grrrrr…."

"Just jump, using the force."

"Okay…"

Kana jumped, it was obvious she wasn't going to make it. So Jez yelled out

"USE THE FORCE!!"

Kana did, she farted.

"Wahooo…" Kana landed on the island. She grabbed the shrub and looked around.

"I'm trapped!"

"Do the same thing as before!"

"My tank is empty!"

"I'll go get a ladder!"

"Okay, I'll wait here."

Kana waited and waited and continued to wait. Finally Jez returned with the ladder. Jez laid the ladder across the dangerous sewage.

"Okay climb across!"

Kana crawled across and stood up.

"Lets go."

They raced back to the council room.

"1 hour 30 minutes!" yelled Matt as they raced through the door.

"That was my time." Yelled Qui-Gon.

"You bet on us!!" said Jez with a shocked look on her face.

"I bet an hour." Said Matt.

Obi tried to stay in the background but Kana saw him and yelled out

"What did you bet Obi?"

"Ummmm…I didn't bet."

"Sure you didn't, he bet 3 days." Said Matt.

"3 days! 3 days! 3 days! Did last night mean nothing to you?!" yelled Kana.

"Well it was fun and all but you weren't very fast." Obi stated.

"It was Monopoly it isn't supposed to be fast."

"Ohhh…"

"Matter not it does, the test you did pass, Jedi Knights you will be."

"Yay!!" all three yelled.

Well ladies and gentlemen that's it for not. I have a sad but important announcement to make… The next chapter is the last chapter of the fic, so at the end we're going to put a list of Thank You notes to people that made this fic possible. Please don't cry it's not the end of the world. So ta ta

Kana, Matt, Jez


	7. Chapter 7

The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple Ch

The Three Wackos go to the Jedi Temple

Chapter 7

Disclaimer: We own nothing of the Star Wars Universe or any thing else that we mention, except ourselves.

Three Years Later

The door opened and Darth Maul stepped through.

"Go Queen we'll take care of him." Yelled Matt.

"Okay, take care of your selves." Said Queen Amidala as she and her men ran for the other door.

"Anakin hide somewhere safe." Called out Jez.

With that Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, Matt, Kana and Jez attacked as one. Matt lashed out with his whip, Kana stabbed with both of her sabers, and Jez ran circles around him. Darth Maul backed up through a door that lead into the core room. He jumped from catwalk to catwalk all the time the five raced after. Darth Maul ran down a hall and into the melting room.

The group followed him in and proceeded to attack.

Darth Maul backed up to the melting pot. The group swarmed around him. He was about to back flip over it, when Kana, Matt, and Jez looked at each other and nodded. All three lunged at him in mid-jump. Obi-Wan yelled as all four plunged into the pit. As they fell, Matt's whip curled around Darth Maul and cut him in half. The group used the force to slow their decent. Darth Mauls lifeless body fell away. As the group fell a white light began to gather around the group. There was a flash and the group disappeared from the melting pot.

The group woke up thirty seconds later lying on the floor. They jumped to their feet with their lightsabers drawn. They looked around and as one they yelled,

"We're back!"

"You have learned your lesson."

The group whipped around to see the Jedi Apprentice book floating in front of them.

"We did?" asked Matt.

"Yes, you saved Qui-Gon from his death. You did so with out regard of what would happen to you. This is the lesson you learned." Said the Book.

"You guys change fast, and by the way you're all signed up for the play." Said Witikko.

The book dropped to the floor with a thud.

"What is the date?"

"June 3rd 2001."

"No time passed!"

"Cool."

Witikko sped off.

"This is not your last adventure. There will be many more."

"Ohhh….yay….."

"There is another destined to join you, in your next quest.

"What's their name?"

"The Village Idiot. Your next adventure is The Search for the Village Idiot."

The End

Well folks that's The End, At least of this fic. We all hope that you enjoyed it. Now before we go we the Wackos would like to Thank the following people or companies for making this fic possible.

Witikko- For encouraging us to write things.

George Lucas- For creating the Star Wars Universe.

Microsoft- For creating Word, without it there wouldn't be a digital version of this fic. It would all be on paper otherwise.

Paper-Mate- For selling us the pencils and pens needed to write the fic down.

And an Extra Special Thanks to:

Our Friends- For putting up with countless hours of bouncing ideas of there heads. May the injuries heal quickly.

And Finally:

Mountain Dew- With out it we would not be our normal Wacko selves.

Jez, Matt, Kana


End file.
